I'm trying not to get OCD on this.....
This morning we go to school, slightly late on arrival so head into the corridor. Usual bedlam in the corridor of kids hanging coats, parents and teachers trying to get by.
T happy enough, then sees her/ hears her. Looks at me with eyes of fear and starts to head towards the exit saying I don't like Miss H. I stop him and get down to his height and speak with him to help calm him down as he's crying. Give him a hug and start to ask him to take his coat off and hang it. Miss C - the classroom assistant asks is everything all right and I look at her and say not really. All of a sudden Miss H has come from the classroom doorway to where we are and is there taking T's coat off him and grabbing him into the classroom? As per yesterday.....what can I say and why is this woman thinking she is capable of doing my role as a parent and not allowing me to manage the situation in a gentler manner? I think she is either a bully or just doens't have a clue, nor does she respect anyone else's point of view and I think she thinks I molly coddle him - I don't and I will not be judged by anyone on the evidence of maybe 5-10 mins per day of seeing me interact with my son who is usually in tears on arrival or departure from her classroom.
I also have to mention to her that I need to speak with her later on pick up as I can't do the appointment the school has set for me (no prior notification or consideration of geography/ journey/ work/ life issues) to do the parent conference tomorrow at 4.15 pm. What do I get back? Why not, what are my reasons for not doing it - not I hasten to say asked in a concilatory or helpful manner, rather a challenge as if I'm a child not handing my homework in. Instead of saying I don't have to justify to you what my reasons are, I try to explain that the arrangements I had made to attend have fallen through and I don't have childcare. She then says there is childcare on offer in the school in the gym, like I'm stupid not to know this. Oh say I , no-one told me that and its my first time to do this - I'd asked another mother who is the classroom mother if there was some arrangement and she had said that there wasn't. So I'm not reliant upon the schools usual lack of information I do go out and find out for myself. I am then told I'll have to swap with another parent - forgive me Miss H, but which other parent is going to be willing to take the 4.15 slot on Wednesday when school closes at 12.45? Oh yes she says. I then say I'm not willing to travel for 45 mins each way on a Wednesday afternoon just for a 15 mins interview. No answer as shes gone into the classroom manhandling my son.
I follow them into the classroom as I have his morning snack. I can't even speak with her as she's already sitting down at the head of the mat full of children with the classroom assistant with my sobbing son on her lap. I leave a note addressed to her on her desk. I want to discuss with her the issues that are apparent and get her pov on my son in the class. However she doesn't listen to me, she says black when I've said white and she seems to take it out on my son.
I'm seriously not happy. I am now in know that the other teacher who possibly could be a more suitable fit in the next class is leaving the school. So I'm questioning not just the teacher but why am I considering moving my life to be nearer to the school - the costs in volved of renting or buying in that area are 25% more than where we are when its no fxing good? The teacher alone is not an issue, but there are issues otherwise with the way the whole school is run; communication, feel, headmaster, telephone aerial in playground, etc that is really not right.
Teachers out there - is it normal to take a crying child's coat off whilst his parent is trying to calm him down? Would you do it, especially if you thought that the child was overly sensitive and had an issue about the transition of arrival at school? Or would you decide the parent is a mollycoddler and doesn't have a clue herself? Answers please?